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AW-tiquette : Courteous Citizens do it in Style (part1).

  Sometimes i feel like i don't have a partner (borrowed from the Red Hot Chili Peppers, thx guys). Let me explain what i mean. In my searches for news i encounter a lot of cits in different sits. And right after i barge in i can measure the degree of good taste. It begins with the "Hi"'s, over the "how are you"'s and it usually ends with the "Bye"'s. I know the internet doesn't know any rules. Anarchy and chaos are it's structures. But where people meet, some degree of courtesy, even in the less pleasant situations is a  factor that makes the AW-experience a lot more tasty. 

Below we offer you hints and tips that might come in handy where it comes to style, class, courtesy and being cool without being arrogant. At least that's what we think....You even might recognise yourself in the following lines.  Feel free to send in more do's and don't's, we'll publish them if we find them ok. 

We'll make a series of this, because there's a lot that can be said on courtesy and you need to practice... This week part one :  

Landings and greeting formulas  
1. Come in from 5a (50 metres altitude) in the middle of , let's say AW GZ and say : "Kaboem" or "Vavoem, and then he appeared". Don't scream "WATCH YOUR HEADS". Although it might be found funny (just once), it indicates a lack of concern. Indeed you show you're a careless person when you arrive. Worse is saying nothing at all. It rains cats and dogs, so please don't make it rain lurkers. The most stylish incoming lines when landing in a crowd include the following ingredients : 

- A greeting or hailing word : i.e. Hi, Goodevening, Bonsoir, Gutenabend, ..... 
- A noun or a few words that depict the group for you : i.e. Fauna, Lurkers, PPl behind the avs, crowd, loved ones, fish and other avs.....  
- In this stage of the conversation, refer to yourself in the third person. Don't say : "I have my suitcase in my hand" but "He is a salesman".
After this first line, give the crowd some time to respond. If you're really a dare-devil, you can start greeting every present avatar individually, before they did explicitly. You're taking a chance there on getting considered very impolite since you greet persons that didn't address you yet. But .... sometimes in groups where you're known, you can do that. The people there will only think you're either a newbie citizen or looking for attention. But, again, showing you're looking for attention is polite. 

2. Depending on the degree you're accepted you can shake hands, hug, smooch or smirk. Even kisses are in order sometimes. But those you gotta be careful with. Check first if you're avatar took a breathmint first. Things you don't do are "grab", "bust", "encroach", "hook"...... unless you're a neanderthaler. 
All kinds of special characters or textual nuances can distinguish your hugs from others : 

- the brace : the number of braces indicates the degree of tightness of the hug : {hugs}  
or {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{ hugs}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}. Take care there's an equal number of braces on both sides. You would look ridiculous if someone counted them. (yeah, i know you're counting 
- alternatively you could use asterisks : *hugs*. This is a "low-fat"-hug. It won't add to the recipients weight. 
- hugs come in all kinds : just plain, manly, womanly, group-, tight and huge ....... Using such adjectives kinda personalise your hugs. 
- for even more personal hugs, you simply add your handle or part of it to them : Simonhugs. 
- the ultimate personalised hug is the one you give in the language of the recipient : Simonklemmer (Norwegian), Simonknuffels (Dutch), Embrassements Simon (French)......
3. Sequence of greeting : different methods are used.  
- S.O.G.O. : Greeting in order of appearance. See One Greet One. 
- S.O.G.O.B.T.L. : Same as above, but tourists last. 
- L.O.G.O. (or S.F) : In order of personal emotional importance. Like One Greet One (a.k.a. Simon First). 
- L.A.G.O. : In order of Avatar liking (Like Avatar Greet One) 
- A.F.B.S.C.T.D.F.E.F.F.S.G.S.H.E.I.N.J.T.K.E.L.T.M.T.N.F.O.F.P.S.Q.S.R.E.S.N.T.T.U.T.V.T.W.T.X.T.Y.T.Z.T. :You could greet the cits in Alphabetical Order (A First B Second C Third D Fourth E Fifth F Sixth G Seventh H Eighth I Ninth J Tenth  K Eleventh L Twelfth M Thirteenth N Fourteenth O Fifteenth P Sixteenth Q Seventeenth R Eighteenth S Nineteenth T Twentieth U Twentyfirst V Twentysecond W Twentythird X Twentyfourth Y Twentyfifth Z Twentysixth). This is a very seldomly used way to greet except maybe for bots. 
- last, but not least R.G.B.A.M.A.R. : Random Greeting Because All Methods Above are Ridiculous. 
4. If you gotta start the conversation, you can do that by saying how the weather at your place is. It's an old opening, but in AW it gained some sense. You might be so far away from your conversation partners, and they might be interested. Other classics are : "Whazzup", "How's it hanging", "How's life". Maybe you can find a start in the answer..... Or say something about the hair-do of the avatar closest to you and what a great job was done with it. 

So, this concludes our first part of AW-tiquette. These are not rules, merely guidelines for trying to get a great time in AW. It's offered to you for free, so you do with it what you like. Next week we'll talk about abbreviations and accessories.   

                                               Simon Says
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